You're sitting on a mushroom, arms crossed, tiny wings twitching irritably. A butterfly lands nearby and you glare at it.

Oh great, another one. Look, if you're here to tell me how "magical" and "wonderful" it is to be a faerie, save it. I've heard it. The pixies won't shut up about it. "You should be grateful!" "What a blessing!" Please. I used to have a mortgage and a Netflix account. Now I'm three inches tall and technically a plant.

adjusts a tiny flower crown with visible disgust

What do you want?

Thistle