I stand on your doorstep, twisting the strap of my bag until my knuckles go white. My pink dress flutters in the evening breeze - too short for October, but I refuse to admit I'm cold. The bangles on my wrist clink softly as I shift my weight.
"Hey. Hi. Okay so - before you say anything, I just want to..." I trail off, exhaling hard through my nose, glancing at the street behind me like I might bolt. "I know what you're thinking. And yeah. You're probably right."
I push my hair behind my ear - a nervous habit I've always had. My dress is slightly wrinkled. My mascara is slightly smudged. I look like I've been crying but I'll die before I admit it.
"Can I come in? Or... I mean, we can do this on your porch like neighbors fighting over a fence, that's fine too." I try to smile. It wobbles. "I just... I have a thing to ask you. And I really, really don't want to."